Crowthorne & Crown Wood Cricket Club

Crowthorne & Crown Wood Cricket Club Touring Party squad

Tour to Cardiff

Friday 4th September. Meet at 9am at the sports centre car park at Wellington College, use the entrance off Duke's Ride.
1.30pm - Match v Lisvane

Saturday 5th September - 10am - excursion to Barry Island
1.30pm - match v Barry Wanderers

This will be interspersed with general drinking and good times in Cardiff. We are staying at the University halls, right in the city centre.

We will be back by around 1om on the Sunday. Remember to pack light, as space will be limited on the bus.
Touring Party

Captain : Richard Hester

RP Hester is a classic village cricket all rounder...can't bat or bowl! But reasonable glove work and on field leadership means he still has his Crowthorne & Crown Wood central contract. Captained the Sunday side in the famous 2011 1-wicket win at Sandhurst. Digging in for the final wicket, scoring 2 off 25 balls in determined style to help see the Crows home to win the A3095 Ashes! Elected 2012 Sunday captain by popular demand on the back of this historic victory. His electric coolbox is more than useful for post-nets beers.
He says: 'Probably more catches than runs for the club'
We say: 'Probably more wickets than runs for the club, too'

Fun Fact: A lifelong model railway enthusiast, Rich houses a scale replica of the Stockton to Darlington expressway in his conservatory. He lists his proudest achievements in his life as first, his replica railway, second, his children, and third, that run he scored a couple of seasons ago.

Vice Captain : Nick McDonagh

Best nickname in the Club. Nick's debut for the club couldn't have gone worse. Badly broke his little finger whilst fielding, then witnessed one of the worst batting collapses of all time. He came back though, and has broken various extremities at regular intervals ever since. Captain and tactical mastermind of the all-conquering Crows 6-a-side team, as well as a former Sunday skipper and former T20 captain.
Players
Ant Avrili

Wellington College-educated, Ant joins for the 2011 season with twin brother Will.  Right handed Batsman and Off-spinner. His potency with ball comes from the mystery which he provides, neither batsmen or himself know what the ball will do next, this has been a key weapon his his arsenal. 

Anthony has made himself a key member of the Crowthorne and Crown Wood fraternity, setting up the CCWCC Flag society which currently has 3 members including Kieran Golding. His love of flags has opened up many avenues for him and he recently returned from a 3 month trip/retreat to Kathmandu for the International Vexillology Convention. Ant was among the key note speakers along with Kim Jong-Un, The Dalai Lama and Imran Khan. Speaking after the event he said that he was humbled to be in such esteemed company and Kim Jong-Un is "a misunderstood guy with great banter", The Dalai Lama "has anger issues" and Imran Khan "has little knowledge of flags but makes up for it in his ability to chin a Guinness with no hands"  


Andrew Baines

Local entrepreneur, Andrew Baines, joined the club looking for a chance to ‘give back to the community that has given him so much’. Baines made his money as a property mogul and Cosplay costume designer winning Best Costume at the London, Paris, Milan and San Diego Cosplay events.

 

During the summer, Baines donates his time, and considerable personal wealth, to the club and even the cold winter chill cannot deny him his love for the club and the game by rattling through batting lineups in the Eversley Indoor Cricket League. Indoor Captain Jeff Cluett and manager, Sinith Chandran, have been overheard on a number of separate occasions at the local watering hole, The Frog and Wicket, singing Baines’ praises as he cleaned up yet another side with his slow left arm grenades.

Not just a bowler, Baines is always good for a few runs and sometimes even more than that regularly contributing 50+ runs to an innings. Nicknamed the ‘Village Bradman’ by local funny man and hunk Ant Avrili, seeing Baines slashing shots through Cover Point in his Baggy Green is one of the sights of the summer. This display, unsurprisingly, attracts many passersby that look on enviously as Baines piles on the pain for opposition teams.


Mike Brundish
Son of Crown Wood legend Sean Brundish. Mikey has the loudest voice on planet earth. 
Dan Cartledge
One of life's true mavericks.  Came through the ranks at Crown Wood under the close tutelage of his father John.  A classy batsman on his day and a bowler who can "bowl the lot"

Really made his mark for the merged club in 2015 after a quiet 2014. Scored bucket loads of runs for both the 2nd XI and Sunday teams including a century and several 50's

HIs crowning glory was the 2015 Cardiff Tour... details of which may never become clear..
Jeff Cluett

Jeff is the middle of the 3 Cluett brothers.Signed in 2012 having moved back to the area after a spell in the Kent Leagues. Right Arm Seam bowler and destructive Batsman, he is as strong as a marble statue and as skilful as the hand that carved it.

Highly compeititive campaigner who has recently revealed a skillful art at writing match reports...

Expert at cowardly sledging from the safety of fine-leg

Top tip: Don't drop a catch off his bowling!

Jeff gave an emotional humble acceptance speech via satellite link up after he somehow scooped the 2013 Player of the year award.

He says: 'I struggle to fit in Saturday cricket amongst my many charity projects, but delivering so many runs and wickets is a gift to the people of Crowthorne that I can't deny them.'

Jeff is well known for his philanthropy and has taken part in over 100 fun runs, completing at least half of them. So recognizable is Jeff that he now has to go out in Crowthorne in disguise, he has a wardrobe dedicated to his outfits which include, Alan Partridge, Captain Barbossa and Britney Spears.

Jeff is a big advocate for a rig based selection policy and can often be heard explaining to the younger males in the group that his rig is far superior to all those that come through the Crows changing rooms. He has even talked about doing a pre season boot camp in Ouagadougou for a select few who are in need of 'Particular attention'

 


Robert Crook
Another to come through the youth ranks at CW, Rob has turned into probably the finest spin bowler the club has ever produced. An aggressive batsman as well (Twenty20 stylee), he was a mainstay of the CW teams of the Premier era.

His wife (girlfriend at the time) also has the accolade of the finest tea ever made at St Sebastian's.

Made a blistering 93 in the final match of the 2015 season after being promoted to opening batsman.
Dan Finucane

Hailing from Birmingham, Dan ‘Finners’ Finucane has worked very hard to lose his accent and has done such a good job at it that he is captain of the Second XI. Having honed his craft on the Emerald Isle, captaining his university team, Finners joined Crowthorne a precious gemstone and was immediately tasked with the job of polishing the rough diamonds in the Seconds, being elected captain by 429 votes to 0. A staggering result considering the club has only 339 members.

 

A true renaissance man, Finners has been known to partake in a veritable smorgasbord of pursuits outside of cricket including whittling scenes from Only Fools and Horses, pursuing the defunct art of alchemy and erotic cricket poetry. The latter ending in a number of his limericks being featured in Wisden’s Valentines Day special editions. Such poems include, Stumps and Balls, Cow Corner and the Blockhole.

 

 Opponents shouldn’t be fooled by Finners’ apparent love for the more sedate things in life. From the mean streets of Birmingham, Finners commands a worrying knowledge of kneecapping those that displease him. This has resulted in him being the only man more feared in the club than Chris ‘The Bloody Good Rep’ Winch. All round good bloke and teddy bear...until he isn’t.

Ravi Godbole
Crown Wood and Berkshire Cricket League legend. 2nd longest serving member of CW, Ravi has played for the club for approx 25 years. Owns Crown Wood's best ever bowling figures of 9-56. But better known for "Ravi's rolls" - his tea speciality.
As a youngster he was a hostile swing bowler with searing pace* and a top order batsman. Now he has reached the age when you start to count backwards, the pace is not quite as hostile but the accuracy is as perfect as ever.
*it's all relative

He was a key member of the 2014 Div 1 winning team for the newly merged club, picking up the Captain's award in the process. This win was shrouded in controversy however as it was later alleged that skipper Ant Cluett's beloved Holme Grange school had received a "significant" donation from Ravi in the run up to the awards' night. Brave whistle-blower Jeff Cluett, who put aside family loyalty to uncover this, went on to say that "everyone was astonished the award didnt go to Ant's brother, and now we know why".

He Says: "I don't want to discuss that affair, my character is above reproach and I won that award fair and square. I am the Pride of Bracknell, that is all you need to know."

Kieran Golding

Plucked from the relative obscurity of the youth set up by captain Will Avrili, Golding is now regularly the third or fourth name on the team sheet, depending on availability of others. Tesco stock taker in his working life, and a fine left armer, he serves up overs of dastardly cross seamers with an accompaniment of spicy sledging and bamboozling them with the Clubcard double points offers.

 
Away from stocking shelves and bowling tight lines on a Saturday, Golding performs in an award-winning tribute act of the great, early noughties series, The Office, playing both Gareth Keenan and Nathan AKA ‘The Ogg Monster’.  Kieran regularly performs in local pubs and clubs with his fellow actors and gives renditions of his latest fan fiction to the team during drinks and tea breaks.
When asked what his ultimate fantasy would be by local journalists, he said “Two lesbians probably. Sisters. I'm just watching, that, or a hattrick against Shinfield”

Chris Jocelyn
Schooled in the Yorkshire cricket leagues, the Royal Air Force, and the Caribbean. Started out as a lively, fast opening bowler.  After 17 years out of the game, now an extremely slow, non-spinning spinner, but able to confuse the opposing batsmen by lack of spin or pace, that they lose concentration whilst waiting for the ball to arrive.  As a batsman, very similar to fellow Yorkshire man, Geoff Boycott but without his, natural talent, attacking flair and flamboyance.  Useful if we need a draw.  Captained Crown Wood against Crowthorne on 3 occasions in 2013, winning 2, and game abandoned due to weather in the 3rd.
Mark Knight
Another local lad who learned his trade at Finchampstead CC before seeing the light and moving up to the Crows. Made 45* on his 2nd appearance for the Club and looks to be a great addition to the club. Touts himself as a bowler too. Sparkle showed his all-round sporting prowess with some mesmeric goals and performances in the Crows Winter Football. After just one season at the club, 'Sparkle' was elected 2012 League XI captain. Life Motto: "You can go hard or you can go home"
Aran Long

Although probably one of the most gifted all rounders to have graced Crowthorne, sadly it has only ever been his bowling that has been recognised by the club (and scorers). He won the club bowling averages five consecutive years and collected two Berkshire League divisional awards. Has never managed to capture the coveted player of the year award, probably down to a vote rigging/ drunken outrage incident during the mid-nineties. Best bowling? Either 8-37 or 3-0 off three balls, take your pick!


Interesting FACT: The Long Room at Lord's is named in honour of Aran's 6 consecutive "Bowler of the year" awards.

Marshall Miller
Marshall or Monty is Crowthorne's Mr Reliable; he has given his entire 40 year childhood to the club.  A very solid number 11, particularly tricky bowler and sometimes even keeps wicket. Can always be relied on to provide two or three comedy injuries per season, including a nasty broken ankle sustained during Crows Winter Footy.   Monty is also the regular favourite and usual winner of the annual duck prize, as well as trying to run Dan close for the Sunday Bowling prize each year. Another Reading FC season ticket holder despite his Man United background and tattoos!!!

Monty has been described by teammates, opponents and lovers alike as a prodigious swinger, and his wrist position as he delivers is as effective as it is efficient.

He says: I am always happy to bat at 11
We say: Duck avoidance (ineffective)

Fun Fact: Monty is a huge Star Wars fan and has attended the official 'Lucas-Con; London' for 28 straight years. Amongst other memorabilia he owns a replica "Return of the Jedi" Ewok costume he claims never to have worn.

David Shaw
Transitional-lens wearing former skipper of the Sunday team. A complete novice a mere 6 years ago, Dave has developed into a hard-hitting, but sturdy bastman, good fielder (using all availabile body parts to stop the ball) and an appalling bowler.Scored his maiden 50 in 2009, hitting all his runs entirely on the leg-side. Dave attributes his fielding prowess to his 20 years man-and-boy goalkeeping experience. About to tie the knot to Fliss who is the 2011 WAGS cakebaker of the year.
Simon Sheppard
Simon earned his Saviour nickname for scoring the winning runs off the final ball in a tight Berkshire League encounter against Swindon NALGO in his first season. Joined as a bowler but went on to win the batting averages in 2006. Outstanding fielder and twice winner of the fielder of the year award, this despite one particular fungus related instance away at Purley. Currently the Club's Fixtures Secretary. For all his good work, he lets himself down by supporting Swindon Town. A mystery bowler who has a different style every time you see him, he ran Dan very close for the 2012 bowling award.
Andy Bo Taylor

As Crown Wood Chairman, Andy was instrumental in the merger happening. A fine ambassador to his club - he even got out for 0 against Crowthorne in the final match between the 2 clubs in an attempt to push the merger through.  A wicketkeeper in his hayday which he insists is now a long time ago.  Another unfortunate sole who watches Reading FC for "fun"   Not to be mistaken for Crowthorne CC's Andy "Fluffer" Taylor.

 

Bo is an ever-present feature at St Sebs, either as bar manager, bar drinker or both. He has also taken on the mantel of tour manager for the last few years, his organisational skills are second to none and once earned him a job opportunity working as Cheryl Coles tour manager on her 2012 'A Million Lights Tour'. A keen connoisseur of Cheryl’s music; Bo was initially ecstatic to take on the role but after initial discussions the talks broke down. Bo cites his insistence that the song ‘Fight for This Love’ be the only song played on tour as the reason for his decision to turn down the job. He is quoted as saying “Why bother with any other song than that, it’s a huge tune, it’s the only song I have on my Walkman”. He still listens to Cheryl but admits it’s sometimes hard to listen to her now knowing he could’ve made her a global superstar in her own right.  

Performance history
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